I am puke
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize