girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
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If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
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The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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