So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize