This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
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the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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