I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
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All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
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Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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