guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
All the doctor said was why
Randomize