I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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