Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
He felt like a one man threesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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