I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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