We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
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