What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize