yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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