I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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