so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize