I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize