Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
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