I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize