im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
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