"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Randomize