I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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