So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize