does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize