Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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