so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize