So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
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Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
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Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
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