Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
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