no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
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The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
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I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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