I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
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