There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
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