Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
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