You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
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