Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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