saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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