I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I don't deserve a penis
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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