at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I think im going to throw up on grandma
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
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