so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize