Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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