Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Randomize