I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
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