Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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