Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Randomize