You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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