hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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