Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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