is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
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