Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
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dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
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Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
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