don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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