So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
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