if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
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