So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's paint friendship bongs
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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